A CURE
FOR SELF-CENTEREDNESS
By Pastor John Cook
Self-centeredness is a
problem in our society today. Most people that I know are not totally self-centered
but many Christians that I have observed are still more self-centered than
God-centered. God's word has much to say about this, of which I will only
be able to touch on a few in this article.
A self-centered person
isn't concerned about with the needs of others: they are selfish, self-seeking,
self-concerned, wrapped up in oneself, self-important.
In Phil. 2:3-4, the Amplified
Bible says: "Do nothing from factional motives (through contentiousness, strife,
selfishness, or for unworthy ends) or prompted by conceit and empty arrogance.
Instead, in the true spirit of humility (lowliness of mind) let each regard
the others as better than and superior to himself (thinking more highly of
one another than you do of yourselves). V.4 Let each of you esteem and look
upon and be concerned for not (merely) his own interests, but also each for
the interests of others."
Self-centeredness is not
something most people set out to be in life, we get that way by not teaching
and feeding our "born-again spirit" how to grow up and be centered in Christ
and not self. Imagine what a place this world would be if every human being
alive adopted and practiced Phil. 2:3-4! Conflict would disappear, strife
would be banished, enmity, and jealousy would cease to exist. Think how the
workplace environment would be altered. Backstabbing and gossiping would become
things of the past. Office politics would cease. The need for litigation and
lawsuits would all but vanish. We know that this will never be in this fallen
world of corrupt and sinful humanity who live for themselves, but this is
indeed the norm for those of us who inhabit the kingdom of God in Christ.
When the apostle Paul
wrote this, he struck directly at the root of the sinful nature in all mankind:
self-centeredness. When we are born-again, our nature in our spirit is changed
to our Father's nature and that nature desires to produce the "fruit of the
spirit" as found in Gal.5:22-23. The outer man, our flesh, does not get saved
and still wants to be self-centered and live for itself. Consider for a moment
the person eaten up with jealousy. What is dominating their thought processes?
Themselves!! They are looking at the abundance of another and then pining
away because their focus is squarely on themselves and their own interests.
If they truly regarded the other person as more important than themselves,
they would be rejoicing at their prosperity, rather than fretting at their
own perceived shortfall.
Or consider the case of
the one who has an angry temper and is not a bit hesitant to let it be known.
Do you think they are looking out for the interests of others? Of course not!!
Once again, their focus is squarely on themselves. They could care less what
their cruel words do to the other person who is on the receiving end of them.
All they are thinking of is themselves and the perceived injustice done to
them. How many men and women have thoughtlessly and selfishly damaged their
mate's spirit by their cutting remarks? Imagine the difference that would
take place in the household if both spouses would think of each other's feelings
before they open their mouths to do battle.
The list could go on and
on. Bitterness (look what they did to ME); un-forgiveness (you have no idea
how wronged I have been); greed (I must have more, I don't care who I have
to hurt or what I have to do to get it); gossip (who cares what damage I do
to them); slander (I hope I hurt them, they deserve it). These are sins against
others and all of them have their root in the self-centeredness of the carnal
nature.
The real answer is found
in Phil. 2:5-8 "Let this mind (to think, to have a mindset) be in you which
was also in Christ Jesus, V.6 who being in the form of God did not consider
it robbery to be equal with God, V.7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking
the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men, V.8 and being
found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the
point of death, even the death of the cross."
If we will get the same
mindset as Jesus had and let ourselves be conformed into His image by prayer,
reading and studying God's Word then we will slowly get away from being self-centered.
Also, in Eph.5:1-2 He gives us more information in how to walk in humility,
it says, "Therefore, be imitators of God as dear children. V.2 And walk in
love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and
a sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling aroma." We need to learn to view all
that we do and say in the light of how it affects others.
We need to learn to put
other's first and there is no better place to start than in our own homes
and among our own families. This is one of the ways in which we follow our
Lord's commands to "deny ourselves, take up our cross daily and follow him."
You might be tempted to say, "This is not easy." You are absolutely correct.
It is not "natural" for fallen humanity to think this way. Only those who
have been "born-again" by the Holy Spirit possess the desire and the ability
to do this. I trust this information will help you in your personal walk with
God. God bless you richly.
Doug & Ginny Meier
Oil of Joy Ministries
2337 - 65th Lane NW
Olympia, WA 98502
(360) 489-0657